Beauty and the Beast: A Horny Love Story ★★★★★

Christmas has crept back into the capital, which can only mean one thing: He’s Behind You! has returned to Charing Cross Theatre with another gloriously unhinged festive frolic. This year, they abandon any pretence of Disneyfication for Beauty and the Beast: A Horny Love Story, a title that tells you everything you need to know… and yet somehow still undersells the outrageous fun within. He’s Behind You! have quietly carved out a reputation for delivering some of the best off-West End pantos in town, and this romp of a show cements it. It’s a riotously filthy delight filled with proper belly laughs, one a minute, and not a weak link in its cast.

We’re whisked off to the Scottish Highlands and the sleepy village of Lichmanochers, tastefully twinned, of course, with Sucmacoch, where the locals burst into an opening number so knowingly reminiscent of “Belle” you can almost hear a team of Disney lawyers sharpening their quills. But the homage ends there. Instead, we’re introduced to Flora, a savvy single mum, and her twins Bertie and Bonnie: he’s the dazzlingly handsome, absurdly ‘gifted’ gay son, and she’s the competent, gadget-fixing lesbian daughter who keeps the whole household (and the petrol station) ticking over. Their lives take a turn into panto-esque chaos, though, when Flora is swept off by the villainous Cornelius and dropped ‘dripping wet’ into the Beast’s massive… castle.

This year’s cast is a knockout. Chris Lane returns this time as the panto baddie (Cornelius) and revels in the role, dripping with the kind of camp villainy adult panto dreams are made of. Lane’s performance is consistent with previous years, but this time around he is back in his groove playing a villainous character, casting shade over both his fellow cast but most noticeably the audience who don’t escape his evil bitchy wrath! Dani Mirels (Juno the Enchantress) and Laura Anna-Mead (an adorably earnest Bonnie) both shine, with vocals as sharp as their comic beats. Their love story is unexpected and slightly tenuous but weaves another welcome thread through the already packed storyline, increasing the show’s depth.

Matt Kennedy gives Bertie the perfect blend of charm and cheek, emphasis on the word ‘cheek’, but whilst aesthetically suited for the role and with a soaring voice, doesn’t always land the plethora of gags in his reflective ballad. Meanwhile, Ben Mabberley steals scenes left, right, and centre with a brilliantly nimble turn as Harris and Angus. In scenes when he could be considered an addition to the plot, Mabberley doesn’t miss an opportunity to ensure his lines make an impact with brilliant comic timing and dry expression.

Keanu Adolphus Johnson offers a surprisingly nuanced Beast, at a far greater level of acting than you might expect from a show of this ilk; even his growls have just the right level of menace and deep vocal skill before transforming into what can only be described as a bona fide gay Disney prince, complete with the looks to match. But the show this year belongs, once again, to Matthew Baldwin. His Flora is a masterclass in panto damery: razor-sharp wit, sublime timing, and a stage presence that sweeps the audience along with every raised eyebrow. His opening scene in the petrol station goes beyond scene-stealing; his interaction with the audience and fellow cast is nothing short of hilarious. Baldwin is a true master in his field.

Owen Arkrow and Olivia-Grace Weaver round off the cast with a flurry of characters, each delivered with such gusto that “ensemble” feels too small a word for what they contribute.

Beauty and the Beast: A Horny Love Story! is not a flawless piece; some scenes stretch their worth, and the songbook is noticeably slim, but that pales into insignificance as what is here lands with gusto and delivers every ounce of festive joy you might hope is under your panto tree. More importantly, it’s unapologetically committed to the adult panto humour we all need in our lives right now.

He’s Behind You! proves once again that when it comes to adult panto, they’re in a league of their own.